Friends to lovers: popularized, favored, and overlooked by science

DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/19485506211026992

Commentary

In this study, while there are multiple paths to romance for people, relationship science does not reflect this reality.

This study overwhelmingly focuses on the romance that sparks between strangers and overlooks the romance that develops between friends in a relationship initiation study published in a popular journal (Study 1) and cited in a popular textbook (Study 2). While this limited focus may be justified when friends are rare or undesirable to initiate first, this study found the opposite to be true.

A meta-analysis of seven samples of college students and crowdsourced adults (Study 3; N= 1,897), two-thirds reported friend-first initiation, with friend-first initiation being the preferred initiation method among college students. (Study 4)

These studies confirm that friend-first initiation is a common and preferred method of initiation in romantic relationships that has been overlooked by relationship science.

The researchers explain the possible reasons for this oversight and explain that they will examine the implications for the dominant theories of relationship initiation.